It's just my luck to end up getting stuck to everything you are.

I'm such an emotional wreck. PTSD+OCD= Rosanna. And when you're a PTSD kid, you kinda fail at dealing with your emotions. I suppose it doesn't help that I have indie acoustic music on. I can't help that my name sounds like Dellilah and I'm going to New York City soon... so I want to listen to the song, but it makes me even sadder. I don't even know why I am sad! There is only one reason I can think of, but that shouldn't really cause any of these emotions... it was just the only out of the ordinary thing that happened today. I really don't think it's what caused it. But then again, I do have that horrible habbit or lieing to myself, that's OCD for you. I hate the way my mind works sometimes. All I need is an eating dissorder and I'm Cassie from Skins. Well, everyone thinks I have one anyway (which I don't, sorry collar bones), so I suppose I am Cassie from Skins. Ha. Who would have thought it? I wrote a poem today, I like it. You're not seeing it though. I like how I want to be a poet after uni but I hate people seeing my stuff. I like how this blog entry has no structure, but that's how I feel right now. A lack of stucture. So we'll say that this blog has dramatic effect. I wish I lived in California. I wish I could just call Vivien when I feel like this and let her make me cookies, because cookies are always good, y'know? Uh oh, Vivien is leaving now. I hate time zones. And geographical placements. They are my two worst enimies right now. What was the point to this blog again? Oh, yeah, I hate feeling like this. I have never felt this awful before, and I don't even know what is wrong. I think I feel worse now. I don't think you're still reading this, are you? This must be uber depressive. Wanna know what else is depresive? The poem 'Mariana' by Tenneson, he's pretty awesome. I suppose you want me to leave now? But this is my blog and I'll cry for attention if I want to. All Vivien's talk of cookies has made me hungry now. I might text Charlie back, but I felt too 'meh' to move my fingers. Urgh, I hatehatehatehatehatehatehate this feeling so much. What the hell? That song has been on repeat for far too long now. It's okay, now I have The Spill Canvas on. It's depressive, I need depressive. I think I analysed 'Mariana' too much today. I will leave now because this could go on for a long time.

"The truth is, I've never fallen so hard."